MY HOUSE, MY CAT, MY RULES

Source: facebook.com/crazycatloversunited

1. THIS IS THE CAT'S HOME, not yours, so show some respect. If you have been invited around, then you know me well enough to know I AM A CAT LOVER.
   
2. If you want to sit down, find an empty seat, DON'T EXPECT THE CAT TO MOVE.
   
3. If you don't want to get covered in cat hair, the DON'T SIT DOWN, bring a lint roller or strip off at the coor (although I rather hope you don't).
   
4. DON'T ASK ME TO REMOVE THE CAT from a room, would you ask someone to shove their child in the attic when you come over?
   
5. If you are allergic to cats, then that's not my probmem, take a pill and QUIT WHINNIG.l Or better still, don't come over.
   
6. DON'T SHOO AWAY THE CAT if the cat decides to say hello, please don't be rude or I'll have to shoo you out the door.
   
7. If the cat chooses to sit on you, feel honoured not annoyed. IF YOU UPSET THE CAT then I will unleash Hell. You have been warned.
   
8. NO NEED TO TELL ME YOUR OPINION regarding the cat being 'allowed' to walk on the table, scratch the sofa etc. See ruel number 1.
   
9. Saying "IT'S JUST A CAT" to me is offecsive, the cat is part of my family. I love and respect all my family, including the ones with four legs.
   
10. Finally, remember this at all times I PREFER THE CAT TO YOU.